Here are a few words of some 2001 movies I’ve seen in a hotel or on a plane that didn’t get reviewed previously:
BLOW (***) - It’s really a two star movie that gets an extra half of a star for some of the performances (Depp, Liotta), and another extra half a star for style. Director Ted Demme dove into the time period and life of Depp’s character and came out with a good looking film. But, it’s tough to feel sorry for anybody in the drug biz, and Penelope Cruz continues to fail to impress me. I figure I’ve got to see one of her Spanish films to find out what the big deal is.
DR. DOLITTLE 2 (**1/2) - A dog with Norm Macdonald’s voice can’t be all bad. And it isn’t. In fact, in the style of the first film, there isn’t a whole lot that’s extremely bad about “Dr. Dolittle 2”. There’s also not a whole lot that’s new. The Dr. has evolved a bit, become somewhat of a celebrity, but the animals do the same wiseacre stuff they did the first time around. More of the same, if that’s what you want.
TOMB RAIDER (no stars) - This is, without a doubt, the world’s biggest, steaming PILE. What a horrible theft of precious, valuable time I could’ve spent looking at one of those paintings where, if you look long enough, a unicorn pops out at you. That is TEN times more interesting than this worthless Hollywood effort. The plot is unrecognizable, the effects are shoddy and plastic, the dialogue is retarded and Angelina Jolie couldn’t have been more of a poser if she were doing a Lara Croft centerfold. Poor Jon Voight even shows up to go down with his daughter’s ship. This movie really addresses the issue of low expectations. They convince you to see this, and, as the film unfolds, you can see how little they the makers of it think of you. They are sure you’ll swallow and inane storyline, as long as it jump-cuts quickly and is LOUD. The makers of this film are positive that you are an idiot. An awful, awful film. The year’s worst.
SEXY BEAST (**) - I was hoping the big deal would be bigger. The critical raves this film got made me very excited to check it out. But I thought the film was caught in a plot device that didn’t pack enough weight. A main character is killed at one point, and that death is supposed to hang over the head of the lead character. Then brews the tension, suspense, lies and deceit that are the consequence of the death. Sounds good on paper, but I never got a real sense of danger from the evil characters or the consequences of murder. I didn’t care like I did in something like “Blood Simple” or “Bound”. You can also put this one in the “Trainspotting Hall of Fame” of films shot in the English language that need subtitles.
I would LOVE your responses.
Please bring ‘em on.
- Paul
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