Greetings all -
It's time for the big, hollow, summer movie season. So, I thought I'd clear my head of what Hollywood had to offer this spring. I'd love any feedback you got. I'm paying for computer time, so let's just get into it!:
Dinosaur - ** - It gets 2 stars out of 4 because I liked pretty much exactly HALF the movie. The look was great, the sound was terrible. By sound, I mean, THEY TALKED!!! The damn dinosaurs talked!! I came into the movie jaded by that, but decided to give it a chance, thinking that there must be some kind of plot-importance to the idea that they speak like modern humans. Wrong. They talk so they can pass off weak, "hip" dialogue. THEY TALK!! If it were a cartoon, I'd give 'em some slack. But, they go to such, million-dollar lengths to create a look and sound of realism. From the dinosaurs snorting to the texture of their skin. Still, they don't come close to the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park. They didn't eat the lawyer on the toilet, belch and say "Object this!". So, when this film's "villains", the Carnotaurs, make an appearance, they're really in the vein of Spielberg's dinosaurs, bloodthirsty, mean and REAL. Why? Because they tried so damn hard to make them real!! But the other characters talk, and I find that to suck. They shouldn't have Land-Before-Timed it to death.
Battlefield Earth - * - this movie blows. Don't even bother. Travolta is not convincing, the action is incoherent (I've mentioned this before, only Spielberg and Cameron can film action that is sensible. The era of Michael Bay and Jerry Bruckheimer have ruined action - just wait to see how much of "Gone in 60 Seconds" you actually comprehend), the dialogue is laughable, the plot is useless. Don't get me wrong, they look like they've spent some money, but it's a pathetic attempt at entertainment. And, for all the money they've spent, it still looks like they occasionally had to borrow matte paintings from "Logan's Run".
Frequency - **1/2 - This movie had a really interesting premise, and director Gregory Hoblit (Primal Fear, a movie I LOVED) does a great job of raising the stakes continually. But, there are some plot points that don't belong in such a smart movie. Dennis Quaid escapes from a police station in a completely irrational manner, and there's schmaltz in FULL effect. But, the suspense is enjoyable, and the clever script make for some memorable moments. Dennis Quaid should stop doing dialects.
Gladiator - ***1/2 - Go see this movie if you're looking for the first (and perhaps only), big-time Hollywood epic action piece. It is a truly impressive film. First of all, if director Ridley Scott is about anything, he's about style and visual ARTs. He brings the Roman Empire to glorious life not only in a fascinating recreation of the Roman Collisseum, but huge armies, giant statues, flags and temples. You never doubt you are THERE. The plot here is similar to Braveheart, sometimes a little too much so. A man is punished by a zealous governmental leader, he seeks revenge, gets caught up in the wheelings and dealings of a new, uprising government. But all the elements are in place in this film and the gladiator battles look better then ever. It's light years from Spartacus and Ben-Hur. The sound effects are bone-crunchingly effective (I love that adjective). Russell Crowe is great, I've been waiting for a vehicle for him that'd showcase his physicality and no-bs attitude. The whole cast is great, I was worried about Joaquin Phoenix, but he straddles effectively between leader and brat. I didn't think America would give a rat's ass about a gladiator movie, thinking they're strictly for "Airplane" jokes anymore. I changed my mind quick. It's real good stuff, go see it.
U-571 - *** - I saw this with a friend of mine who debunked alot of the military facts in it: "Germans didn't have that sonar technology by then; Germans wouldn't know morse code". Etc., etc., etc. I, personally, didn't care about any of that. I enjoyed what I saw. An excellent ensemble, good production and another film script that continually raises the stakes. You just don't know how these guys are going to get out of the next big problem they've gotten themselves into. It's a good ride. Plus, it's got Bill Paxton. Bill the man Paxton. How cool is that?
End of Part one
James Bond will return
More to come,
Paul